For such a short month, February can bring a lot of stress. January is basically one giant hangover from the holiday season, so February is when you have to get your life back together. Along with this hassle, we have Valentine’s Day to contend with. Valentine’s Day has never been my favorite holiday. While the intentions may be noble (have a day dedicated to the people you love) it has become such a production that it makes even the most hopeless romantic a little cynical. If you find yourself single on the 14th, let these books make you feel better about avoiding the hearts and flowers clichés.
When your Facebook feed is flooded with new engagements: Anything written by Chelsea Handler
Chelsea Handler may not be your cup of tea, but there are few people in the world who enjoy single life more than she does. She gleefully mocks cheesy couples (do not get her started on a cash bar at a wedding) and openly discusses her most disastrous one-night stands without any measurable embarrassment.
Chelsea is the friend you wish you had, because while you are wallowing in your singledom, she is relishing in it. Unfortunately, you probably can’t call her up to commiserate about all the wedding presents you will soon be on the hook for (and if you can, get me her number). Luckily, she has amassed quite a list of books for you to enjoy. I’m not a vodka fan, but as it is Chelsea’s drink of choice, it only seems fitting that her books should be enjoyed with a Grey Goose on the rocks.
If your friends think you are getting too picky: The Rosie Project, Graeme Simsion
Don Tillman, a genetics professor, is brilliant at science, but baffled by dating and romance. When he is told by a friend that he would make a wonderful husband, he comes to the conclusion that his perfect mate is, statistically, out there for him to find. And thus begins The Wife Project, an experiment based on a 16-page survey designed to find Don his ideal mate. Don’s mission is waylaid when he meets Rosie.
A smoker, a drinker and perpetually late, Rosie is nothing like the paramour Don envisioned. But as he spends more time with the feisty Rosie, Don starts to wonder if his Wife Project isn’t better left on paper.
Told from the perspective of the unintentionally hilarious, yet completely charming Professor Tillman, this novel is perfect for anyone who has ever put too much thought into finding “the perfect guy or girl. Reading it will forever convince you that sometimes opposites do attract.
If you are still pining over your ex: The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald
Nick Caraway, a World War I veteran, moves to Long Island during the height of the Jazz Age. He soon becomes fascinated by the enigmatic Jay Gatsby, whose lavish parties are infamous in the village of West Egg. Gatsby eventually reveals his unrequited love for Nick’s cousin Daisy, and that his extravagant lifestyle is all carefully crafted to gain her attention. Nick eventually facilitates a reunion between the two, and their connection leads to dramatic consequences for those around them.
We all have a tendency to romanticize that past. It is easier to occupy yourself with “what if” and “what could have been” than to admit that what is in the past is probably best left there. If you have been toying with the idea of reconnecting with your on again/off again ex, then it is time to pour yourself a cocktail and reacquaint yourself with Jay Gatsby. Just do yourself a favor and turn off your cell phone first, because drunk texting is never a good idea.
If you are fed up with online dating: Modern Romance by Aziz Ansari
I was hesitant to pick this book up, because I didn’t think I could separate Aziz Ansari from his Parks and Recreation character, Tom Haverford. Don’t get me wrong, Tom was a fantastic character who never failed to crack me up, but he is the last person who should be giving advice on love. Fortunately, Aziz is far more thoughtful, but no less hilarious, than his alter ego.
Modern Romance tackles the pitfalls of dating in the digital age. Tinder, texting and even Reddit, this book takes a look at all the ways technology has changed how we meet and make connections. Told with the brilliant observational comedy that Ansari is famous for, this book will make you feel so much better about wanting to toss out your phone and swear off social media forever.
Tom Haverford taught us all how to treat ourselves, and now Ansari is taking up the mantle. Before you swipe left on another Tinder match, let Modern Romance give you a new perspective on our dating world.
Buzzfeed recently did an interview with Tina and Amy in which they gave advice to women. They tackled everything from mommy shaming to on again/off again relationships. When one reader asked, “I’m 29 and single. Should I be worried?” Tina point blank responded, “About ISIS yes, not about that.” It is a simple moment but completely hilarious and true to form for two of the funniest women in Hollywood. Both Tina and Amy make a point to talk about how hard women can be on themselves, and how sometimes we just need to give ourselves a break.
Being single on Valentine’s Day can feel like you are wearing a giant sign that says “ALONE” around your neck. Take a leaf out of Tina and Amy’s books, literally, and cut yourself some slack. Pick up one, or both, of these laugh out loud memoirs and let these badass comedic powerhouses inspire you.
Any books that get you through this time of year as a single person? Share in the comments.
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